We’ve just made it through Halloween and now every store is covered with Christmas!
I even found a radio station that is playing all Christmas music, all day, every day, and started Nov 1. Don’t get me wrong – I LOVE Christmas! But there’s another holiday in between that is often skipped over and leaves us asking, so what happened to Thanksgiving? Thanksgiving can mean many different things to people, but one common factor is being thankful. Being thankful is wonderful, but we may need to take it a step further and focus on gratitude.
Gratitude is defined as not only the quality of being thankful, but also readiness to show appreciation for and to return kindness. This implies action. Gratitude is more than just good manners and saying thank you – it’s a mindset and a lifestyle, and it’s actually healthy for us!
Studies show that cultivating gratitude can increase happiness levels by 25 percent. It can also cause individuals to live happier, more satisfied lives and have more positive attitudes toward school, work, and family.
So how can we practice gratitude ourselves and instill it in our children?
Here are some tips:
• Count your blessings. Pick a time every day or week to sit down and express what you’re thankful for (verbalyl or written). This is a great tradition for the whole family that can be done year-round, not just at Thanksgiving.
• Write a thank-you note. You can make others, and yourself, happier and nurture your relationship with another person by writing a thank-you letter expressing your enjoyment and appreciation of that person’s impact on your life.
• Pray/Meditate. Prayer and mindfulness meditation involves focusing on the present moment without judgment. Although people often focus on a word or phrase (such as “peace”), it is also possible to focus on what you’re grateful for (the warmth of the sun, a pleasant sound, etc.).
• Be a grateful parent. We all love our kids, and hopefully they know that, but go beyond and give specific reasons why they’re special. Then their self-esteem is boosted for the right reasons, and it will be an example for how they can show their gratefulness to others.
• Set a good example. Easier said than done, I know. But the values our children embrace as they get older aren’t those we nag them into learning, but the ones they see us living out. Look for teachable moments daily and insist on politeness and respect to all those around you. There are countless opportunities every day for us to model gratitude to our kids — for example, thanking the waitress who serves your food, the cashier who rings you up at the grocery store, the teller at the bank who cashes your check. When our kids see us expressing sincere thanks all the time, they’ll be more inclined to do so as well.
• Encourage your children to give back. The old saying “it’s better to give than to receive” has stuck around for a reason. It really does feel great to help someone else out. All of us at any age can help, so find something that each member of the family can do to help someone else – whether at home or out in the community. When kids give their time and energy to help others, they’re less likely to take things like health, home and family for granted.
Practicing gratitude will help us to acknowledge the goodness in our lives. As we prepare for the Thanksgiving season, I’ll leave you with one of my favorite quotes and hope that we can all work to make gratitude our new mindset and lifestyle. . . “Gratitude can transform common days into thanksgivings, turn routine jobs into joy, and change ordinary opportunities into blessings.”
Laura Shellhammer is a child development specialist and Executive Director of the Early Childhood Coalition.